Why Wolfram Alpha Rocks

Take a look at the "comparison as mass" box on the bottom of the image. Impressive isn't it (click on image of larger screen if you can't read it)?

-runiteking1

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The Carnivourus Cologne

Do you like... meat? Or how about that juicy, tasty  Whopper? Then Burger King has the right cologne for you!

Wait... what! Burger King?

This cologne is  "the scent of seduction with a hint of flame-broilled meat," the perfect companion for when you feel that eating that 1000 calories Whopper STILL won't satisfy you. Or maybe just to impress/chase away that nice lady who hates/loves PETA.

The thing even has a website, nicely named firemeetsdesire.com. The moment you enter the website, some nice seductive music pops on with the spray being in the midst of it all.

Next thing you now, roses pop out of nowhere to fill the screen...

The only thing that's missing is the King lying down there seductively:

-runiteking1

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The Agonizing Dinners

My little brother sucks at eating.

I mean, he just loves to eat those special little treats looks JUST so delicious but doesn't like the normal food. I think the normal dinner that we have is perfectly fine, perfectly yummy... yet he takes more than 50 minutes to eat a meal that barely weights 8 ounces.

One thing that sorts of bugs me is his reluctance to eat new stuff. He constantly just "hates" new, exotic food without even trying it. I mean, most of these food are pretty expensive compared to just plain rice and what about those poorer children? Maybe this is a bit too philosophical...

We have tried somethings to make him eat better. He seems to enjoy a new Pokemon/Yugioh rip-off called Bakugan. I think it's pretty lame, some thing like Medabots except marketable to kids by using trading cards. The smart thing they did is that they use a Transformer like action figure that rolls up into a ball, meaning more money for those Japanese corporate vampires that suck hard working moms dry... take a look:



Now today I tried something a little different. I flaunted right in front of him the idea of me playing the Wii without him, by myself. That seemed to trigger something within him and he bursted out crying within seconds.

Maybe eating food is just not his strong point.

-runiteking1

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The Asian Translations

I talked about why one shouldn't translate to another language while not using a native speaker of that language. Maybe you remember the story where a Chinese restaurant displayed their name as "Object not found"? Well, how about another translation:

So while scientists in the western world has worked so hard to perfect making artificial beef, Chinese scientist has bypass the cow and went straight for the fowl. They now have perfected the art of making artificial duck meat.

And lets not even start talking about the picture... it's, almost... PERFECT. Of course, like every other food packaging, the picture is grossly over Photoshopped and the actual thing is much less delightful than that (I forgot to take a picture of the actual thing... how could I forget!?). 

-runiteking1

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Don't Talk!

It's been a long time since the last post about my little brother... so here's some nice, yummy stuff.

During dinner, we always seems to have a little fight over table manners. No matter what happens, sometime in the middle of the course, he shouts out "Food in your mouth, don't talk!" Of course, I do have food in my mouth, and I was talking... but he had food in his mouth too!

What was I suppose to do? If I say "food in YOUR mouth too....," then I'll be talking with food in my mouth, and if I don't reply, he'll give me that gotcha-look. It's pretty annoying.

Of course, being the bright kid that I am, I think I might be able to get him off me. You see, now-a-days, I chew with very little food in my mouth, thus I'm able to quickly swallow the food and respond "No! You have food in your mouth too!" This method of flanking the attacker has worked flawlessly except once.

While at the dinner table today, he did the stereotypical food-in-your-mouth thing, and I replied with the method outlined above. He just plainly replied "Don't talk." What was I suppose to say to that? "No! You don't talk...?" or should I comply? All these choices go through my head, until I enough time had passed that his attention span has passed to another topic...

-runiteking1

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Ice Cream of Dumbness

See anything wrong with this photo?

Maybe you need to look a bit harder... notice how it says 90 calories per piece in the very front.

Now lets zoom in into the nutrition facts to verify that.

Notice how it says 80 calories per piece...

And from my experince:

-runiteking1

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Hoaxsters/Aliens With Pie

The most complex crop ring has just been found in a barley field at Britain. Take a look at this:

Now, from the article, apparently that circle is a coded image of pi...

"The code is based on 10 angular segments with the radial jumps being the indicator of each segment.

"Starting at the centre and counting the number of one-tenth segments in each section contained by the change in radius clearly shows the values of the first 10 digits in the value of pi."

I think its the aliens way of telling us to make a pie in the next 24-hours before they come in and take our pies...

Bush - Mr. Gates, I need you place an order for 300 doughnuts and a huge pie to deliver to Mr. Brown over at England.
Robert Gates - What in the world Mr. President...
Bush - I said I need to deliver a giant pie to Prime Minister Brown!
Robert Gates - Uhmmm.... okay, from which provider sir?
Bush - Ask the prisoners at Gitmo to make it, and while you're at it, get me a Bud Light.
Robert Gates - May I ask why sir.
Bush - Its for my alien friends...

Hehe...

-runiteking1

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Chinese Restaurant

So right now, I'm out of town on vacation and for dinner, I ate at a Chinese restaurant (whose name shall not be identified). Here's some of the stuff I noticed.

1. Oyster. I love raw oyster, and thus I eat them by the hundreds. So when I arrived at the buffet, I found out that they had oysters and immediately started feasting. Our table of two families almost completely devoured the oysters in a matter of minutes.

The next thing we know, they were not refilling the raw oyster bar (is that what you call it?). This sorts of reminds me of this comic I saw this morning. (Zits: 6/6/08)

(Words: I could've sworn the blinds were open and the lights were on a minute ago...)



2. Zodiacs. I'm Chinese and I'm proud of it, but I never figured out the zodiac thing about how a monkey should avoid a rat or something like that. Today, I finally did it! After staring at the sheet for more than I should have, I figured that every zodiac four years from yours are "good" and the zodiac six years from you is "bad."

I'm so proud of myself. :)



3. Buffets in general. Since I'm Chinese, I can distinguish between good and bad Chinese food. So far, every buffet I ever been to have the exact same taste. I think a lot of people can relate this with me as most buffet have the usual "Authentic Chinese Taste." Complete B.S.



p.s. After we finished our dinner, I saw one of the most amazing sunsets... too bad I didn't have a camera with me. Here's a pretty good reproduction from Flickr

-runiteking1

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Canned Food Medley

So for lunch today, I had a bunch of canned food. Here are some things I noticed:

1. Yoplait is quite nice, but also very bad too. Notice the "Kosher Gelatin." Also notice the second ingredient on the list is corn syrup... (click on picture to proceed to the larger one).

2. "Salted Bamboo shoots (stripped) in chili oil." How do you strip bamboo shoots in chili oil?

3. I never saw this feature in an American canned food, so it might be of sunrise to some:

And voila! A spoon!

-runiteking1

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The Obesity Killer

I've writing about eating healthy before but my dad reminded me of a fool-proof method. The answer? Compulsory conscription.

Just today, one of my dad's friends from Singapore (who's policy is compulsory conscription) called about his experience in the national service. According to my dad, he use to be quite... chubby but after joining the service, lost quite a few pounds (I didn't ask for the specific number as it might be rude).

Sure, if the country is involved in some long, grueling war that it will never win, this might not gain popular support. But think of all the health benefits of a 10-weeks Basic Military Training, no one would be obese ever again.

-runiteking1

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Paradoxs of Eating (Healthy)

This evening, I had quite a, dare I say, weird meal. Egg plant parmesan with tempura (deep fried veggies, the Japenese way), Chinese soup and bak choy. The questioned that popped up in my head was, "Is this even remotely close to healthy?" The parmesan was quite oily, but made with real mozzarella cheese and eggplants. Is vegetables still healthy even after being deep fried? Is spinach ice-cream more healthy than chocolate one? Hmmm....

Deep thoughts prompted by eating, the root of all invention.

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